Becoming a better person and still ending my people-pleasing ways

Why am I so intuitive?

Having recently had a wonderful visit with a dear friend, who’s more like a twin, I say that because we are very much alike. It is of great comfort to me to know her and spend time with her because if I did not have her, I would go through life explaining that I am not a judgmental, paranoid witch. Having someone in my life who is on top her game as I am, I never feel the need to explain. I realize that a lot of what people say and do are “habits”..and that is something I do as well. I may respond to a comical email with “how funny”..instead of using my own brain and writing “I think that was so funny, I really laughed!”. I may also “automatically” be polite because I am polite and very much about respect. In hindsight though, I will ask myself “why didn’t you just tell ____to to take a long walk off a short pier?” Or be more direct and tell them exactly what is on your mind??

 Because sometimes you aren’t in the mood to have a headache that will ensue, sometimes you just do the polite thing because, in reality, you are not aggressive..unless you are forced to be.  So, I get ALL that…I DO. What I don’t GET is those that constantly lie, pretend, sneak, and plot. They do this with their friends, they do this with co-workers, job applications, the tax department (idiots) and everything they come into contact with. There’s always a plan, to have it all come out in their favor. Leave nothing to fate, because they know that the universe doesn’t like their kind much at all. 

Many people are just unhappy, and for good reasons some of the time, finances stink, relationship stinks, maybe they have lost someone they love dearly to the heavens, maybe they have lost their job, it could be that they have had or been in a terrible accident or some trauma, it could just be GUILT..whatever it is, for each person it is REAL and it does affect them and how they carry out their day to day to lives.  It doesn’t have to, but you can’t tell them that unless they want to change their lives around. The sort of people I am speaking about may well have those issues, and it could very well be what makes them the “demons from hell” that they are today..frankly, I don’t care!  

Should those people find themselves in my circle of people, that I call my friends, (not my facebook friends, my REAL friends) they will swiftly find out, and become greatly annoyed that they can not pull the ropes with me. Ah, yes, for a while, they will…because I am a trusting person, and I am a person who overlooks A LOT of things.  It is not a requirement of friends to agree on everything n’ anything..sometimes you have to accept their false as they must accept yours..but only up to the point that you see their false lies within their soul and they are actually a soul-sucking demon in human clothing. That’s when most run..but it is when I expose them..initially, people will say “nooo, you have them all wrong”..or “you’re reading too much into it”, and even “do you even like anybody?”..these things I must live with, but I do not stop ripping layer after layer down..and finally, people see what I showed them all isn’t rewarding, it ticks me off because I HAD TO PROVE I WAS RIGHT  to be believed. BUT, that is HOW good these “people” make themselves out to be. Except with me and others like me. 

I watch someones face and eye movement when telling me a story without even realising it..because when I begin to doubt the story, I will later (even months later) recall what they were wearing, their facial expression, eye movements, the pitches in their voice, their hand gestures, etc.and I know when someone is talking to me, I’m not analysing them, on a conscious level, anyway.  I have always disliked a woman a family member married because I live out of the country, it was just email contact and later facebook contact… I knew from the opening gate I did not like her, though I tried very much to like her..I set aside many things she said, implied, and reacted to and how she reacted to order to like the end, I concluded that I could not stand her, not because I’m a witch, but because she is, as well as a pathological liar and an attention seeking slag.  She made a highly offensive status one day, and I called her on it… After I did, 2 others echoed my retaliate, she went on a mission to do her best to humiliate me, which did not go very she knows little to nothing about me, she began to make things up, as she was dwindling down with trying to prove what she was saying about me, (because she could not) she deleted me..thus disabling my ability to defend myself. Which is fine..but it proves my intuition about her.  No good, from the opening gate. Since that has occurred, she has offended my sister and my mother..while I am sorry that happened, it again, proved what I was saying all along, she’s DRAMA.

As for my friend, my twin..she gets it, as she warned me before about someone and I didn’t listen..that will never happen again.

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